Jesus said to them, “Come and eat breakfast.” (John 21)
I went to Paris with my father in the winter before he passed away. We spent a weekend going to a boat show for his business and walking around Montmartre, absorbing the colourful busyness with street artists sketching beautiful drawings and paintings, and a babble of crowds crowding through the side streets to buy wares and sampling the city’s gastronomy in the little restaurants.
I remember sitting at a very high brow eatery during one of the evenings. Dad sat opposite me, his shock of grey hair cropped above a swallowed, grey face and dimming eyes. A cold grey slab of Foie Gras sat nonchalantly on a plate between us. And Dad’s fork picked at it, moving it around, pretending to be interested. I ate my dinner and encouraged him to do the same. But he wasn’t hungry.
We both knew he was dying.
It was our last time together. I can see that now and appreciate more as the years go by, despite the difficulties in our relationship. He made the best effort to spend time with me, as one of his children.
Spending time with a loved one. It’s the imperative – and yet so easily ignored, isn’t it? Every day we get distracted by absolute drudge and dross, and sidestep the more important things. My younger daughter got my attention the other day. I was writing an article, when she appeared in end-of-school mode. And she wanted to show me her new handbag.
My mind was pulled towards my work and the sentences in my head. But my daughter wanted dad-time, so I pushed the laptop away and turned towards her as she explained every minute detail of her new bag. I mean every single pocket and space in her accoutrement, of which she felt thrilled and proud, and wanted me to join in the excitement.
Push away – I mean physically push away any obstacle or distraction that gets in the way of the relationships that matter to you. Time with God. Time with family. Time with friends. Time with strangers, even. Nothing is so important. They are the priority in the fleeting few years that we walk on this Earth before the seeds of our bodies die and our souls rise like flowers to eternity with the Father of the heavenly lights.
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